Complicated Grief: What to Know and How to Heal

Almost everyone will experience grief at some point in life. We all go through periods of loss, and grief can come from more than just losing someone you love. It can happen when you lose a job, sell a home, or make another major life change.

Complicated grief, however, is a bit different. It’s an ongoing, heightened sense of mourning. This kind of grief often prevents the person dealing with it from fully healing and moving forward with their life.

What causes complicated grief, and how is it different? More importantly, what can you do to heal and find peace when you’re dealing with it? Let’s take a closer look.

What Causes Complicated Grief?

There isn’t one underlying cause that creates complicated grief. Rather, it typically has to do with several factors, including the type of loss you’re experiencing and your mental health state or history.

For example, complicated grief is more likely to occur when there’s an unexpected or shocking death, like a tragic accident or suicide. Experiencing multiple losses at once can also contribute to this kind of grief.

On a personal level, everything from a history of anxiety or depression, or negative childhood experiences, to social isolation can increase your risk of experiencing complicated grief. These factors often make it more likely to develop a preoccupation with the loss you’re experiencing, so it’s hard to think about anything else, let alone move forward.

What Are the Symptoms?

On the surface, the symptoms of complicated grief look similar to “normal” grief. But you’re likely to experience more intense, harmful feelings that can quickly have a negative impact on your quality of life.

Complicated grief creates intense emotional pain. You’re likely to experience longing, loneliness, sadness, and potentially even anger or guilt. Some people struggle with identity disruption. You might feel like you’ve lost a part of yourself and you don’t know who you are.

It usually doesn’t take long for the effects of complicated grief to impact nearly every area of life. You might have trouble simply getting through the day and functioning the way you should. It can cause sleep disturbances, physical health problems like a loss of appetite, and even suicidal thoughts.

How Can You Heal?

When you’re dealing with complicated grief, the weight of your emotions can often feel overwhelming. Don’t try to sweep those feelings under the rug. Acknowledging them is the first step toward healing. Be patient with yourself and show self-compassion. When you stop trying to fight your feelings, you can start to work through them.

But don’t do it alone.

Complicated grief can cause you to want to isolate yourself, but that’s likely to make your symptoms worse. Grief therapy is often the best way to work through this type of grief and finally find some peace. Through the therapeutic experience, you’ll learn how to process your emotions, work through negative thoughts, and discover healthy coping mechanisms that will help you with everyday symptoms.

Therapy also helps you set realistic goals for yourself. You can break down the healing process into smaller pieces so it doesn’t feel so overwhelming. When you reach each small goal, it can provide a boost of confidence and give you the motivation you need to continue your journey.

Therapy will also encourage you to practice self-care. Doing at least one thing to promote your well-being each day can make a big difference in how you feel, physically and mentally. Self-care practices will help you see how important it is to truly heal and start the next chapter of your life.

Dealing with any kind of loss is never easy, but complicated grief shouldn’t keep you from truly living your life. If you’re ready to start healing, feel free to reach out today.